First of all, please think about this question first: Do you have any of these 3 habits?

首先，請你想一想，你有沒有這3個習慣：

1. You tend to motivate yourself in negative ways.

第一，你習慣用負面的方式來激勵自己

You may not be a person who already gave up yourself.

你可能并不是一個自暴自棄的人。

You always wanna be someone better.

你總是希望變得更好。

It’s just that when you encourage yourself you usually prefer sentence like “Can’t you even do this?”

只是，你往往會用“難道連這都做不好嗎?”這樣的話來給自己打氣。

Basically you wish to make yourself work harder by making yourself loathe your present self.

從根本上講，你是希望讓自己討厭現在的自己，從而去努力。

2. It’s really hard for you to let go of your mistakes.

第二，你很難原諒自己的錯誤。

You always keep thinking about the mistakes you’ve made and feeling terrible every time you do this.

你總是會反復咀嚼自己以前犯過的錯，而且每次回想起來都會很難受。

Every inopportune speech you’ve given.

每次不合時宜的發言。

Every temper you didn’t manage to control.

每次沒能控制住的脾氣。

And every silly thing that you have done.

還有你以前做過的所有傻事。

You always can’t help but recall them. And every time you recall them you feel the exact pain you felt back then.

你總是忍不住去回憶他們，而每次回憶的時候，你都和當初一樣痛苦難耐。

3. You don’t feel comfortable when someone compliments you.

第三，別人表揚你的時候，你會覺得不舒服

You always feel awkward for the credits people give you. Or you usually think they overestimated you.

你總是對別人贈與的表揚感到尷尬，或者覺得他們有點言過其實。

Sometimes you don’t really think yourself as not good enough.

有時候，你并不是覺得自己做得不夠好。

You know you’ve done the right thing.

你知道自己做了對的事。

You know you deserve recognition.

你知道自己值得被認可。

But somehow you still want to find a hole to hide yourself when someone comes and speaks highly of you.

但是，不知道為什么，當真的有人來贊賞你的時候，你卻想找個洞把自己藏起來。

If you have any one of the 3 traits above, then you should be careful because there might be a dangerous emotion hiding in your heart.

如果你具備以上三點中的任何一點，那你要小心了，你的心里很有可能藏著一種危險的情感。

It’s self-loathing.

那就是自我厭惡。

A lot of people see this emotion as a motivation to keep making themselves improving.

很多人以為這種情感是一種動力，可以讓人不斷完善自己。

But in fact it only stops you from developing.

但其實，這種情感只會阻礙你的自我發展。

It makes you incapable of feeling satisfaction and the sense of accomplishment. And it eventually deprives you of your self-esteem.

它會讓你無法體會滿足感和成就感，并最終剝奪你的自尊。

Sometimes you have to understand the phrases “good enough” and “for now”.

有時候，你得學會理解什么叫“足夠好”和“暫且”。

It’s not easy to face failures with ease. And I never saw anyone who manages it perfectly.

想要學會從容面對失敗并不是一件容易的事，我也沒見過誰能完美地掌握這個能力。

But being afraid of failing is not a reason for giving up.

但害怕失敗并不是放棄嘗試的理由。

Self-loathing is the root of unhappiness.

自我厭惡，是不幸福的根源。

You can loathe who you were. But please don’t loathe who you are that much.

你可以厭惡曾經的自己，但請不要太厭惡現在的自己。

If you really need a motivation, choose hope instead of loathing.

如果你真的需要一個動力，那它應該是希望，而不是厭惡。