IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER

by Erma Bombeck

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would

go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the ’good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day

because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

如果生命可以重來，

我會在自己生病時臥床休息，而不是假裝整個地球將因我今日不在而停止旋轉。

我會在那個玫瑰形狀的粉紅蠟燭在地下室里融化之前將它點燃。

我會少說多聽。

我會請朋友到家里吃飯，雖然我的地毯滿是污漬，沙發已經褪色。

我會在干凈的客廳里吃爆米花，而不是擔心當有人想點燃壁爐時會看到壁爐里未打掃的灰燼。

我會抽出時間聽爺爺絮絮叨叨講他年輕時的往事。

我會替丈夫分憂解難。

我永遠不會在炎熱的夏天因為自己的頭發剛剛梳理和噴好發膠而堅持別人把車窗搖起。